Hubster has a growing obsession of which I am slightly envious as it takes hours of his time each week and brings him both joie de vie and emotional torment in equal measure. Fret not, this isn’t another woman in his life as I’m not sure there is anyone else out there who could cope with his drive and purpose, he is just devoting hours of time to the cultivation of ‘malus domestica’, or to the rest of us mere mortals, the apple.
Mastless
It is harvest time in the orchard on the smallholding, but we’re not making plans for a big celebration on Apple Day which falls on October 21st as this is not a mast year and there is no overabundance of fruit. In fact, following a wet spring and decline in pollinators our crop is ‘meh’ at best however, with fifteen mature apple trees in the orchard planted over a decade ago, we still have lots of fruit.
Over the past decades, many apple varieties have been lost due to changes in farming, urbanisation, and a decrease in demand. A 2022 National Trust survey found that traditional orchards in England and Wales decreased by 81% since 1900. So hubster has the bit between his teeth and is trying to reverse the decline. He, alongside a couple of other pomologists in the North East, are gathering cultivars by collecting scions and then grafting these onto rootstocks. At the last count he had over 40 different types of apples and will continue on his mission to save as many cultivars as possible before they are lost to history.
Truly Scrumptious Apples
More than 7,500 apple varieties are grown world-wide yet in the supermarkets of the UK we tend to see only Pink Lady, Jazz, Golden Delicious, Braeburns and Galas. Local greengrocers often have a better selection than the big shops but from our own orchard we have wonderful varieties including the Bloody Ploughman, a dessert apple named after ploughman shot dead by a gamekeeper when he was caught stealing apples from the Megginch Estate. When his body was returned to his wife, she found stolen apples in his pockets and threw them onto a rubbish heap but one of the resulting seedlings bore apples of a deep, blood red. Even the humble apple can have a great story to tell.
We also have Beauty of Bath, Laxtons Superb, James Grieve, Katya, Peasgood Nonsuch, Scrumptious, Jupiter and Winter Gem. In addition, there are upcoming saplings of Court Pendu Plat, King of Pippins, and Ellison’s Orange. Ironically, here in northern England, the Golden Delicious we’ve tried to grow is one of the most disappointing with scab and blight, although ours are a little less tasteless than the early picked fruit available from shops.
An apple a day
When the offspring were younger, we played apple bobbing around Halloween, now we simply enjoy eating and drinking the harvest. Ranked by medical experts as the #1 health food, apples are high in vitamin C, B6, riboflavin, thiamine, calcium, potassium, and antioxidants. They contain no fat, sodium or cholesterol and are a good source of fibre. Individually they form a perfect snack but at this time of year apple cake, apple crumble, apple pie, apple snow and applesauce are making a regular appearance on the dining room table, delicious on the tongue but deadly for the waistline.
We have a juicer in the kitchen for making apple juice (perfect in a chimayo cocktail with tequila and lime) and a cider press for producing quantities of delicious, golden cider. The tart and acidic Dabinett crop of apples, which form the basis of cider, is good this year yet Hubster is disappointed that the yields of other juicing varieties are probably not high enough to produce a 2024 vintage. We still have plenty from last year but 2025 is also poor then we might start rationing ourselves to a bottle per fortnight.
Our dehydrator produces kilos of dried apple slices, sometimes we add a touch of sugar and cinnamon to make them even more moreish. We run the dehydrator on sunny days using our own solar energy, so the snacks are free apart from the time taken to slice and core the fruit.
There is no such thing as ‘waste’ in the circular economy of the smallholding so, finally, leftover cores and skins are fermented to make apple cider vinegar. We add this to salad dressings, marinades, pickles, and chutneys but it can also be used for cleaning or as the basis for a mineral plant feed. Personally, I’ve never tried it as a beauty product but apparently it can be used when washing hair to improve its shine, I just have a slight fear that when someone walks past me, they’d catch a faint whiff.
Explosion
Last September our school orchard was a sight to behold. There were apples on the trees, under the trees and even a few cheeky ones in the bulging pockets of the Year 7s collected before they lined up at the start of the day. Determined to make the most of this harvest, Mr L the PE teacher and I rallied the students. Armed with baskets, wheelbarrows, and a lot of enthusiasm, we set out to conquer the glut. The pupils, who usually groan at the thought of manual labour, were surprisingly excited. Perhaps it was the promise of apple crumble for lunch or maybe it’s just because they were missing classroom lessons.
Obviously, I reminded the students of the life cycle of an apple as it seemed the perfect teaching moment. We also talked about the importance of not letting food go to waste after I saw Pupil B take a bite out of a cooker, pull a face like he’d eaten a lemon and then chuck the remainder of the apple in the bin.
Over the morning the orchard was transformed into a scene of triumph. Baskets overflowed with apples, and the students, though tired, were beaming with pride. We celebrated with a grand feast of apple crumble with only-slightly lumpy custard. In an assembly on the great apple harvest we reminded everyone that with a bit of teamwork, creativity, and a sense of humour, even the most overwhelming tasks can turn into unforgettable learning adventures.
Many of the apples went to a community juicing event at the rugby club and were canned, then sold to raise funds for a local charity. Unfortunately, this was not quite the end of the story as 6 months later many of the cans exploded suggesting there was some issue in the preservation process. Not one to miss an opportunity, I’m sure I will be able to bring this into my lessons on the biology of respiration or the physics of gases under pressure.
Money trees
Wouldn’t it be wonderful if my dear reader decided to plant a couple of beautiful and bountiful apple trees or become involved in a nearby community orchard? They help support pollinators and can provide valuable fruit after a few years saving a little money on the weekly shop. They are also one of the simplest garden trees to grow.
Autumn to spring is the best time to plant apple trees. Select two or more trees from the same or adjacent pollination group, although self-fertile varieties are available and there are often apple trees growing nearby so there is a high chance a single tree could be pollinated anyway. Plant out in a sunny spot on fertile, moisture-retentive, organic-rich soil. For the best fruit production some annual pruning is required and mulching helps to conserve moisture and reduce competition from weeds and grass. Easy peasy.
It’s a shame there’s no magic money tree the Government can find to avoid austerity measures that hit the poorest the hardest. No, wait, this might not be a mast year, but there is plenty of money to be had. From my perspective, it’s really incredibly simple, just tax the rich. Give this teacher an apple!
Note to self: For hubster’s christmas present, track down a cooking apple called ‘Flower of Kent’, one of which fell next to Sir Isaac Newton, inspiring his understanding of gravitational force – who knows what other bright ideas it could precipitate! Oh, and check the stored apples every fortnight, as the saying goes, one rotten apple spoils the whole barrel.
