I recently wrote an article highlighting the rise of dating app usage in our current society. As of 2023, the United Kingdom stands as the third largest dating market in the world, with over 11.3 million dating apps users based here. Dating apps are a major component at play in modern day dating and in the UK the top three dating apps see more than half a million daily active users according to Statista.
Choosing Hinge
Driven by curiosity, I decided to experience what it would be like to try one of these dating apps, and see for myself if the apps are really worthwhile. I decided to do some research and try to find the app that would appeal more to my preferences. In the end I decided to download Hinge, due to its popularity and because it seemed more serious for dating than other popular apps such as Bumble or Tinder.
I gravitated quickly towards Hinge because the setup of the app makes it more appealing to try and learn more about a person, rather than just focus purely on minimal data and appearances. Hinge allows for large scale customisation of your profile, with multiple pictures and prompts, the ability to include videos, voice notes, polls and lots of facts about yourself and what are your dating goals. In essence I found this app the most fitting to try and to get to know a person the most. Little did I know my expectations for the app were far from what I expected.
Downloading Hinge
I downloaded Hinge on 19 September and immediately, I was asked to create a profile. I took my time filling it out carefully and thoughtfully trying to make it appealing and interesting. In total, it took me over 40 minutes just to set up my profile, which I thought would work for my dating goals. I was eager to start scrolling and try to find people that I might find interesting.
It only took me roughly five minutes of scrolling to realize that most people on the app don’t put as much thought into their profiles. Most people that showed up on my feed had put minimal effort into their profiles. Most profiles had the same prompts used with the same responses, similar poses and setups for pictures. It was just mimic after mimic, and most of the profiles I looked at were keen on just short relationships.
This discouraged me a bit, but I decided to be patient. Eventually it paid off. After scrolling for what seemed like ages, rejecting profile after profile, I was finally able to discover people with more appealing profiles. Similar to other social media, I believe Hinge’s algorithm slowly develops according to the user’s preferences and eventually I was able to see much more variety of profiles. This was a relief for me, although the generic profiles were still appearing, I had a bit of originality to work with and those profiles are the ones I decided to try and look for to try and match.
Getting likes and matching
Over the next few days, I tried to use all of my likes each day to maximise the number of people I could reach out to, but I eventually realised how long and tiring this was. The number of likes one can give out with the free access to Hinge is ten per day. On paper this seems quick to go through in a day, but I found it much harder to use all my likes. It would normally take me more than 30 minutes just to find five profiles that appealed to me enough to send a like. It made me realise how time consuming this app can be. I didn’t really want to spend so much effort scrolling every day, especially when the results did not seem representative of the time and effort put into the app.
In the span of a month, I sent roughly more than 100 likes. Out of those 100, only two of them matched and talked with me, and I was eventually ghosted. On the flipside, I only received a total of seven likes on my profile, and I decided to match with only four of these. Here I was able to chit chat irregularly until I was eventually ghosted. Despite that, I was able to talk enough to one of the women and eventually was able to go out on a date.
I went out on a date with a Spanish woman after talking with her on Hinge on a daily basis. Eventually, I asked for her instagram and we started talking and planning to meet up in person through this. Ultimately, we met up at a pub and ordered a few drinks and started talking. In my eyes the date went well, we always had something to say, and we were both laughing. We stayed in the pub for three hours, and then I walked her home. I was convinced that the date had gone well, but I would eventually learn the harsh reality of online dating.
I texted her a day after we went out, expecting a reply and an opportunity to see each other again, but day after day passed, and there was not a single word back from her. I had been ghosted. I realized that even meeting someone in person does not guarantee success, even if you think it went well.
Male/female disparity on Hinge
A frustrating reality I came to see as well is the huge disparity between the male and female experience on Hinge. Talking to some of my male friend Hinge users, they revealed to me that their experience on the app was similar to mine, with very little success in being matched by liking others and receiving few likes themselves. However, when I talked with my female friends that use Hinge I learned their reality is completely different. My women friends were getting more than 50 plus likes on a daily basis. I felt very frustrated at the sheer possibilities of people they could potentially connect with if they wanted to, but then again I was also told it could be overwhelming for them as well. They feel as if they are constantly on demand, and it also takes a long time to just filter everyone who seems interesting. Even then, I’d gladly have that be my issue over not getting many likes.
Is Hinge worth it?
After trying out the app for a month I can definitely say with certainty that dating online is not for everyone. As a guy, I think the likelihood of finding someone is harder due to the harsh reality of the difference in likes and matches one receives. To a certain degree it can feel kind of daunting and unfair, but if one is resilient and patient then maybe one can find something.
I still am not sure if Hinge is worthwhile to find someone to date, especially since so little progress was made in one month. I have a feeling that if I stay around for a while longer, I can potentially find success here, although it might not be easy. Dedicating time to the app is time consuming and more often than not is disappointing. But if one were ready to gamble a bit of their free time and hope for the best, then one might be able to meet people through here. I will write another review after three months and hope that will be enough experience to finally be able to come to my own decision. Despite this I hope this experience will help someone determine whether Hinge is worth downloading.
