This planet doesn’t need any more human survivors at the hands of sexual abusers and sex traffickers. We need humans to thrive, and this takes work. It also takes learning agency, autonomy and trust within ourselves, to be able to take a stand together against such acts.
Honesty and safe spaces
Sexuality is a core root chakra that every human being has from birth. It’s sacred for all humans no matter what your sexual identity. It’s deeply important for all of us to understand the complexity of self-discovery and to remember what it was like before we became sexually active, in order for us to provide a safe place for children. They are figuring out these feelings and they need support, not exploitation. It takes time; it takes community; it takes adults to dig into their own vulnerabilities, to be at peace with their own losses, to really be present for our youth. It requires the removal of judgement when our teenagers are exploring sex.
We know that young people are going to experiment, so instead of shame or exploitation, conversations about the reality of sexual engagement need to happen in safe places. Children need safe places just as adults do. Not everyone has a solid family, and no one seems to care when children are born into deeply unstable systems. From my point of view, systems of caring for these children are failing. We’re seeing an international unravelling right before our eyes.
So, from the bottom of my heart I say this:
You are not broken because you adapted.
You are not damaged because you endured.
You are not ruined because someone violated your trust.
Your body is still yours.
Your story is still yours.
Your future is still yours.
Healing
Healing does not follow a straight line. Some days you may feel powerful. Other days you may feel numb, angry, grieving, or exhausted. All of it makes sense. Trauma lives in the nervous system, and healing often begins gently – with safety, with steady support, with people who believe you without question.
You deserve to rebuild at your own pace.
You deserve to find safety without conditions.
You deserve care without control.
You deserve touch without fear.
You deserve work without exploitation.
You deserve love without manipulation.
You deserve a voice without punishment.
There is a strength in you that no one could extinguish – because you are still here. Still breathing. Still capable of choosing something different. That alone is extraordinary.
If you are in the early stages of freedom, please be gentle with yourself. Rest. Learn your own rhythms again. Eat when you are hungry. Sleep when you can. Surround yourself with people and resources trained in trauma-informed care. You do not have to navigate this alone.
If you are further along in your healing, know that the waves of memory returning do not mean you are going backward. Sometimes they surface because you are finally safe enough to process them.
You are not what happened to you
You are allowed to take up space.
You are allowed to feel anger.
You are allowed to grieve what was stolen.
You are allowed to reclaim joy.
And joy is not betrayal of your past. It is resistance.
Your life is not defined by what was done to you. It is defined by the courage it takes to move forward anyway- in whatever small or large steps that looks like for you.
There are people in this world who see you not as a headline, not as a statistic, not as a story of tragedy – but as a whole, complex, worthy human being.
You are not what happened to you.
You are still becoming.
With deep respect and compassion,
